这一阵子,我接触到很多关于友情的问题,使我突然觉得,友情在一些人心目中所占的分量,似乎比我平常所想到的要多许多倍。
我发现,这些为友情困恼不已的人,在心里上有两个因素。一个因素是寂寞,另一个因素是太缺少自信。寂寞使一个人把全部生活的重心都放在友情上,缺少自信使一个人对友情患得患失到无以复加的程度,以致一旦失去了友情,他们就找不到自己。
没有一个人不知道重要,但是,在我遇到这几位为友情困恼的朋友之后,我觉得,如果一个人太倚赖友情,那他从友情所得来的并不是快乐,而是更多的苦恼。
我们经常在谈话中强调“一个人把快乐寄托在别人身上,总难免会失望。”这“别人”包括所有的人——朋友、父母、子女、夫妻,一切...
交朋友,应该。爱朋友,可以。
为朋友付出一切,值得!
但是,你不能没有自己。
不但要有自己,而且要信赖自己!
因此,我想要修正大家所经常相信的一个观念,我要劝大家不要总是主动地去企求友情,而是要让友情自动地来临。
引用一部法国电影里的话,一个人如果朋友多了,就没有朋友了!
你可以与朋友处在一种互相吸引的地位,最好是让自己先具备足够吸引朋友的条件。换句话说,先要充实自己,让自己有光芒。这样,在交友方面,你才进可以攻,退可以守,你才不会为友情忧虑紧张,不可终日。
换句话说,要用吸引力去交朋友,而不要施舍恩惠或阿谀的方法去求朋友。
不要希望每一个人都是你的朋友,友情应该听其自然。
爱朋友,喜欢朋友,用诚意去对待朋友,但不要倚赖朋友,更不要苛求朋友。能做到这几点你才可以享受到交友的快乐。
维持友情的另一要诀是“保持距离”。
无论两个人怎样要好,彼此之间那点应有的尊敬总是不可少的。
许多人,和朋友一熟,就不分彼此了。当初认识时的那点礼貌与分寸也不注意了。朋友一到了互相没有敬意,不注意礼貌与分寸的时候,就快要发生误会与磨擦了。
Sunday, November 1, 2009
daily routine
If your life feels like it is lacking the power that you want and the motivation that you need, sometimes all you have to do is shift your point of view.
By training your thoughts to concentrate on the bright side of things, you are more likely to have the incentive to follow through on your goals. You are less likely to be held back by negative ideas that might limit your performance.
Your life can be enhanced, and your happiness enriched, when you choose to change your perspective. Don't leave your future to chance, or wait for things to get better mysteriously on their own. You must go in the direction of your hopes and aspirations. Begin to build your confidence, and work through problems rather than avoid them. Remember that power is not necessarily control over situations, but the ability to deal with whatever comes your way.
Always believe that good things are possible, and remember that mistakes can be lessons that lead to discoveries. Take your fear and transform it into trust; learn to rise above anxiety and doubt. Turn your "worry hours" into "productive hours". Take the energy that you have wasted and direct it toward every worthwhile effort that you can be involved in. You will see beautiful things happen when you allow yourself to experience the joys of life. You will find happiness when you addopt positive thinking into your daily routine and make it an important part of your world.
By training your thoughts to concentrate on the bright side of things, you are more likely to have the incentive to follow through on your goals. You are less likely to be held back by negative ideas that might limit your performance.
Your life can be enhanced, and your happiness enriched, when you choose to change your perspective. Don't leave your future to chance, or wait for things to get better mysteriously on their own. You must go in the direction of your hopes and aspirations. Begin to build your confidence, and work through problems rather than avoid them. Remember that power is not necessarily control over situations, but the ability to deal with whatever comes your way.
Always believe that good things are possible, and remember that mistakes can be lessons that lead to discoveries. Take your fear and transform it into trust; learn to rise above anxiety and doubt. Turn your "worry hours" into "productive hours". Take the energy that you have wasted and direct it toward every worthwhile effort that you can be involved in. You will see beautiful things happen when you allow yourself to experience the joys of life. You will find happiness when you addopt positive thinking into your daily routine and make it an important part of your world.
爱 欣赏
我们生活在一个五彩斑斓的世界,在这个世界里不光有着美丽的风景,同样也有着不同个性、不同气质、不同人格魅力的人。在漫漫的人生旅途中,你会相识、相遇很多的人,不同的人身上有着不同的品质及魅力,欣赏、喜欢和爱便成了我们最难把握的尺度. 有人说,男人和女人最重要的是相知、相爱。其实,在你的一生中,真正能打动你的人,远远不止一个,都去相爱吗?很不现实,爱是一种用心投入的狭隘的情感,它美好但独立而排他。当你爱一个人的时候,便想完完整整的拥有他,包括他的思想、他的情感以及他整个人。但每一次的感动过后,你又能长久的拥有吗?没有永远不变的思想,也没有永远唯一的情感。所以重要的不是爱,而是欣赏。不同的人、不同的品味,会对同一幅景象产生不同的感觉.每一个人都是有血、有肉、有灵魂的,他们的身上同样散发着不同的美,每一种美好的品质都是诱人的。任何时候,学会用欣赏的眼光去看待世界,看待你周围的人,你便会更坦然地面对一切了。XD ..... lolx ~
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